When One Door Closes, Another One Opens: Transitioning from Being a Working Mom to A Stay At Home Mo
Maybe you follow me on Instagram or Facebook, and maybe you don't. If you do, you'll have noticed a rather major development in our family that happened 2 weeks ago. Well, I should say it was official 2 weeks ago. And in all honesty, I had every intention of blogging about it that day, or even a few days after, but as you'll read below, there are definite reasons that hasn't happened!
If you have no idea what I'm talking about, the title of today's blog post should be a dead giveaway. That's right - I am officially a stay at home mom! We had been planning for this to happen sometime NEXT year, but at the Big Man Upstairs would have it, it happened much sooner than that. How? Well, here's the Reader's Digest Version:
When I began working with my previous employer, aka where I worked up until 2 weeks ago, I had every intention of being there for quite some time. I liked the work, I was decent at it, and it paid well. When I came back from maternity leave, I knew something was going on - there had been a few people that had either been let go or left of their own accord. In a large company, that wouldn't be anything to blink an eye at, but we were rather small, so it definitely was something different. But like I said, I liked the work, I was good at it, and it paid well. It allowed me flexibility to leave if I needed to for the kids, and wasn't too stressful. Fast forward to December. We were pulled into a room and told that the brand had been purchased. This meant that marketing and product development people were leaving and going to the purchasing company, while Finance and customer service (I was in finance) would remain employed. HOWEVER, and it was a big however, it was likely that we would see a significant downsizing. Shortly after we were given the news, several people were given notice of when their last day would be. Myself and 3 other people were not. Dan and I decided that I would continue to look for work because we weren't sure what the future would hold for us. When we found out that we were expecting again, it definitely made us think about what that meant for us as far as my work status, but we still carried on with me working and looking for jobs that would be a good fit. Fast forward again a few months, and I found out at the end of April, that my last day, along with all but one other person, would be April 27th. We had about a month's notice, so plenty of time to decide what would happen.
Shortly after I was given my official last day (which we knew was almost certainly coming, but up until that point, we did not know when), Dan and I sat down, looked at our current and future finances, and decided that as of April 27th, when I left the building at work, I would become a stay at home mom. Ever since Annie was born, and honestly even before that, I had this feeling deep down in my gut that THIS was my calling, THIS is what I was meant to do. Before now though, we were not in a position to make that happen. So when the stars aligned (and quite a bit earlier than we had planned), we knew this was the right decision. Now, that's not to say that if the right opportunity comes along for me, that I wouldn't take it, but that remains to be seen.
That last day at work, and consequently the girls last day in daycare, was a real mix of emotions for me. I was very happy to be "retiring," as we like to call it, but also it was bittersweet. I'd be leaving a life behind that I'd known for a long time, and also the routine (although to be honest, the morning routine with 2 kids that young was by far the most stressful part of my day!). The thing that was the MOST bittersweet though, and so emotional for me, was pulling the girls out of daycare. Even though I've wanted to stay at home with them for a long time, I do know that the daycare they were in was FANTASTIC and so good for both of them. Both of their teachers cried when we left, and I started dissolving into a blubbering mess myself (thanks, pregnancy hormones!). It was something I wasn't prepared for - being happy to be home with them, but sad to pull them out of such a wonderful environment. It was very surreal packing up the car with everything (diapers, wipes, nametags, etc) with everything that we had there for them. The picture below perfectly sums up my emotions for the day - happy for the new step, but sad and bittersweet (the upper right is a photo of daycare, not my work).
Prior to leaving work and starting my new life as a stay at home mom, I did a lot of research. I am a very planning oriented person, so for a few weeks before I was officially no longer professionally employed, I made calendars. The first calendar is a month's worth of menus, such as what we will have for breakfast, lunch, and snack each day. The second calendar are out of the house activities, such as story time at Barnes & Noble, Library Day, play dates, and more. The third calendar has 3-4 at home activities we can do each week. I'll get more into this in next week's blog post, but I will say that these calendars have helped IMMENSELY. I don't follow them to a T every day, because, well, an 11-month-old and 2-year-old require me to have some flexibility, but just having them visible as options helps!
Stay tuned next week for a re-cap of my first few weeks of this new life, what I plan on doing differently, what I want to keep the same, and just overall how it's going. For those of you that ARE a stay at home mom, I would absolutely love to hear your advice! What have you found helpful in terms of maintaining routine and your own sanity? I can't wait to hear what you think!